Warning - Nervous Breakdown Ahead

Nervous breakdown is also called emotional breakdown or mental breakdown. To ordinary people that means a time of great stress when you have a lot of identity confusion. I believe many times that this marks a time of transition in a person's life not necessarily a time when the 'world is ending.'

A nervous breakdown is not a time to lost hope or give up. The positive perspective is that you are in a time of transformation from one personality pattern to another healthier personality pattern. It is a 'Positive Breakdown.'

Do you make the mistake of taking on the troubles of the world, too serious, not enough freedom and fun. You might be in the Super responsible (Parental Inversion) life style pattern.

If you have read my article on Nervous Breakdown you would know that such patterns do not last forever. They are imbalanced and we tip over. We squelch our inner child and end up in depresssion.

When something goes wrong, do you think or say: "It's my fault." If so I think you might live with the belief that there is something wrong with you.

Boundaries might be a problem. You do not know where your responsibility ends. You do too much. Add a little self pity. Whine and bitch and you have the family Martyr life style.

One reason this might result in a nervous breakdown is because you meet the needs of others but ignore your own needs.

Study my 'positive disintegration' view of the nervous breakdown. Then you will know that a new better life and higher integration may emerge from a nervous breakdown.

How to feel adequate

If you are not confident in yourself you will feel it. Others will feel it as well.

Some people will not feel adequate or competent because the lose the identity by focusing on pleasing others. This is classical People Pleaser or Performance Orientation.

Another type - the ones I call Super Responsible - (Parental Inversion by Sandfords) may also feel indequate. The reason, almost invariably, is the internal Judge that goes along with Super-responsible.

The Super responsible person may think everything that goes wrong is "My Fault." Associated with that quick 'my fault' is beliefs that 'something is wrong with me,' 'I'm bad,' 'I deserve to be punished' and 'I don't deserve good things.'

When something goes wrong with his performance, his achievement, his competative edge, or he is criticized, the People Pleaser goes into an immediate funk, depression, (or anger) state with beliefs like "I am no good," "I am unloveable," "nobody can love me" and "I am bad." This pattern is described more in The Program and the Pit.

One answer to feeling inadequate is The are adequacy is not of ourselves, says Paul(2 Corinthians 3:4), but our adequacy is of Christ. This helps one to stop focusing on self. That helps.

To some extent we decide how we see ourselves. We make choices to be and feel adequate. People then respond to our confidence. It starts with us.